absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
