hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
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i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
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Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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