I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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