At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize