Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
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