When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
