well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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