Tell her she can't have a vagina
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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