Your tits are I can't wait for
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Randomize
