you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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