i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
