btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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