I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
