He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Randomize
