then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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