yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
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it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
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im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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