I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
