you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
My day in three words: secret purse cake
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
