Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
