the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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