You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sext me about skeletons
Don't tell me you're on acid again
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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