HIV tests are more positive than that guy
so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!