i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
