i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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