Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
