You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
