Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Randomize
