here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
