It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Randomize
