and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
