I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
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