Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry cyn420 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(310): View more from California

I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.

Fav 7 981 2589
share tweet
(908): View more from New Jersey

Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.

Fav 22 9090 1210
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(530): View more from California

Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.

Fav 7 4250 1197
share tweet
(216): View more from Ohio

you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission

Fav 7 4641 1072
share tweet
(913): View more from Kansas

Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now

Fav 35 7767 1255
share tweet
(815): View more from Illinois

Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone

Fav 6 3186 1110
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(301): View more from Maryland

I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.

Fav 15 4531 1190
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(+44): View more from United Kingdom

HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?

Fav 6 532 720
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(978): View more from Massachusetts

I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.

(603): View more from New Hampshire

and how was that received?

Fav 1 49 21
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT