i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
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All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
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well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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