And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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