I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Randomize
