she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
