We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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