the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
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