Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
