he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I can't turn off my feet"
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
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