Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Randomize