At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
