so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize