btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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