Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I need a burrito and a hug.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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