one two three fourrrrnication!
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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