I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize