i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
The air taste purple.
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