my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize
