too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
